ALL ABOUT THE IMFAMOUS RA CAMPAIGN
In retirement I went back to college for remedial geology, Chaucer, metal smithing and other stuff. Our Duluth branch of the University of Minnesota was full of youth who needed a lot of education because they all wore baseball cap visors backward. Then next year I was surprised to discover that their heads had swiveled round 180 degrees and the visor was in front and the face was in back! Style is very important to youth.
But there was another jolt for me, the walls of the halls of ivy sagged with the weight of religious posters. “Come celebrate Christ”, “Newman Club meets at this or that Catholic church”, “Join Students for Praising Cheeses”, and much, much more. I could go along with praising cheeses but maybe it was a typo. My mind went to quandering over thoughts as, “Wasn’t this a secular state school?” “Didn’t these kids know that science had been invented and superstitious ideas were embarrassing at a place of learning?”
So in my usual helpful mode I produced competing posters for THE GREAT GOD RA CAMPAIGN. In hindsight it was an error to refer to THE MIGHTY EGYPIAN SUN GOD because now one knew who or what RA was. That was strange; didn’t they have any education going on here? Why RA was in charge for a hell of a lot longer than any of the current crew. But that is the way with gods, here yesterday and worn out and ignored today. Many of my posters were torn down probably, by Yawheegians. But paper is cheep if you use the blank side of a used sheet so I just poked them up again. It lasted over a year and was fun to listen to the student and faculty responses, (one included below). And now here for historical preservation and for your critical acclaim are some of them.
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WORSHIP RA
LEARN OF RA'S ASTONISHING RETURN TO GODNESS
AT THE RAFTERS THURSDAY EVENINGS
RA WIL BEAT UP MUHAMMAD, JESUS AND
DAVID KORESCH IN TEN ROUNDS
BE THERE OR BE SQUARE
___________________________________________________________________
RA WANTS YOU
TO ATTEND MOSQUE OR CHURCH
AND WORSHIP RA BUT
DON'T LET ON
PRETEND TO WORSHIP THE FALSE GOD
BUT WINK TO OTHERS WHO ARE WEARING SHOES
(THE SECRET SIGN OF RA FOLLOWERS)
_____________________________________________________________
KEEP WARSHIPING RA
RA WILL NEVER PUT DUNG IN YOUR FACE
LIKE SOME GODS IF YOU DON'T SUCH UP
ITS TOLD ABOUT IN MALACHAI
CHAPTER 2 LINES 1 TO 4
DEWSN'T THAT JUST MAKE YOU PUKE FOR A GOD TO ACT LIKE THAT
HELL RA'S MOM WOULDA WASHED HIS LITTLE GOD MOUTH OUT WITH
HARD SOAP IF HE HAD TALKED THAT WAY
BE SURE TO TELL YOUR FRIENDS TO SWITCH TO RA
CAUSE HE IS NICER
_______________________________________________________________
WORSHIP RA
SURE HE IMPROVES YOUR GRADES
BUT WHAT HAVE YOU DON FOR RA LATELY?
COPY THIS POSTER AND SPREAD THE WORD
ABOUT RA FOR WORLD PEACE
SACRIFICE A COW OR SOMETHING
IT COSTS SO LITTLE FOR WHAT YOU GET
___________________________________________________________________
WORSHIP RA
HEAR RA EXPLAIN WHY HE CANCELLED
THE END OF THE WORLD
PLANNED BY LESSER GODS
SHOW YOUR SUPORT FOR RA
WEAR SHOES TO CLASS
ON WEEK DAYS
GET MUCH MORE FOR YOUR
BURNT OFFERINGS WITH RA
_____________________________________________________________________
RA'S FEELINGS ARE HURT
RA WAS ABUSED IN THE STUDENT NEWSPAPER
AND HE IS PLENTY UPSET
JUST FOR THAT RA WILL
LET THE LESSER GODS
DESTROY THE WORLD
SO LET'S GET BACK TO THE REAL GOD
AND DUMP THESE UPSTARTS
AND BE NICE TO RA AGAIN
WORSHIP RA TODAY
OTHERWISE IT COULD BE ALL OVER
IN A TWINKLING AND THEN WHERE WILL YOU BE
WITH YOUR FANCY BOOK LEARNING
________________________________________________________________
DO YOU THINK YOU CAN GO AROUND
ANNOYING RA WITHOUT ANY PUNITY?
THINK AGAIN! ONLY RA STANDS BETWEEN YOU
AND THOSE SILLY NEW GODS
THEY WANT TO FLOOD YOU AND SMITE YOU
AND THEY HAVE BAD BREATH
RA IS SWEET
ALL HE WANTS IS A LITTLE CRISP OX OR LAMB NOW AND THEN
YOU CAN AFFORD IT IF YOU FOR A GROUP
AND WEAR YOUR SHOES TO SHOW YOUR SUPPORT
________________________________________________________________
TELL GOD THAT RA
FORGIVES HIM
EVEN THOUGH GOD FAILS TO ANSWER PRAYER
AND IS OFF DUTY MOST OF THE TIME
AND WHIILE HE WAS IN THE MOOD RA FORGAVE MUHAMAD AND JESUS
AND ALL THE REST
BUT DON'T FORGET TO TOAST UP AN OX OR LAMB NOW
AND THEN FOR RA APPRECIATES THE AROMA AND
WILL SEND GOOD WEATHER
AND GRADES THAT YOU CAN BE PROUD OF
WARSHIP RA TODAY
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UMD COLLECTS THE
RA PAPERS
EARLY EDITIONS GO FOR BIG MONEY
RA PLANS A COMPUS VISIT FOR SIGNING
PROBABLY NEAR THE EXPRESSO STAND
HE LOVES THE AROMA OF TOASTED STUFF
COPY AND SPREAD RA'S WORD ON THIS
AND OTHER CAMPUSES
TO OUR PRIDE THE RE RENEWAL STARTED
HERE ON THE DULUTH CAMPUS
NOT BECAUSE RA HAD DHIS EYE
ON SOME ROASTED BULLDOG*, ALTHOUGH......
________________________________________________________________
(*THE SCHOOL MASCOT FOR SOME REASON)
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